August 2007
54 posts
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Dear Lauren: What I Can Offer You Is Probably Less...
Lauren and Luke had been dating for several months, and Lauren thought it could become serious, especially when, on Valentine’s Day, Luke stared soulfully into her eyes and asked if he could ask her an important question. For the past six months, Luke said, he’d been carrying on a phone and email relationship with a woman from out of town, and now the woman was coming to visit him for...
If You Can't Abide By My Rules, I'll Be Forced To...
Welcome to ‘Crap Email From a Dude’, the Jezebel public service that contends dudes are every bit as crazy as chicks. The names are changed but the insanity is real! After the jump, empathize as a guy named Kevin attempts to induce jealousy, threatens to assume spirit form, and suggests a latent sexual deviancy (and not in a good way) in a missive to his ex-girlfriend, Paula, who had...
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Happy Birthday, You Unwise, Ignorant, Contemptible...
We almost decided not to change the first name of the sender of this Crap Email, because it is really so incidental. We all know this young man. His name is Adam, and Leonard, and James, and Jack, and Tom, and pretty much every generic Caucasian name that arrives, sweetly and earnestly potsmokingly, at dormrooms across America every year only to repair to Latin America four years later and...
Dear Melissa, It Does Not Take A Mathematician, Or...
Melissa and Rob met in a graduate writing program and became instant platonic writing friends. But as the semester wore on, Rob decided he could no longer in good conscience deny Melissa the gift of his massive cock (and also, a wind-up music box.) And that is when the trouble began. Melissa brushed off his overture, hoping their friendship could withstand the brief period of misaligned desires....
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